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  Table of content    
  1. OP explained to her fiancé's mom that they're teaching their son about personal boundaries
  2. OP reiterated her stance on not wanting her kids to feel guilty or responsible for others' feelings
  3. OP asked her future mother-in-law to avoid specific comments towards the children
  4. FMIL expressed to the fiancé that she was unaware of any intentional harm and would further distance herself if needed
  5. OP messaged her future mother-in-law about boundaries and expressed difficulty with in-person conversations
  6. The commenter believes OP was in the wrong for texting about respecting boundaries while not doing the same when the mother-in-law expressed a preference for in-person conversations
  7. The commenter agrees OP was in the wrong
  8. OP was in the wrong for being upset that the mother-in-law expressed her feelings after the child initially refused a hug
  9. OP's appropriate reply should have been a simple acknowledgment like "Okay. Talk soon!"
  10. The initial message was an overreaction to the grandmother expressing happiness about the child choosing to hug her
  11. The commenter says "everyone sucks here"
  12. It was normal when the grandmother asked for a hug and made an innocent comment
  13. This commenter supports the OP, stating that an in-person conversation was unnecessary
  14. This Redditor agrees that the OP was not wrong and the mother-in-law's aversion to texting may be to avoid accountability
  15. This person suggests a strategy to address the issue in person by reassuring the child that he doesn't have to hug someone just because they'll be sad
  16. This Redditor also supports the OP

Mom Asks Mother-In-Law Not To Tell Her Son She's Sad When He Declines Her Hug, Stirs A Debate Among Redditors

On the r/AmItheA**hole subreddit, a mom recently shared a story about her 3-year-old refusing a hug from her future mother-in-law (FMIL). The mom then texted the MIL, asking her not to tell the child she'd be sad if he didn't hug her. This sparked a discussion among Redditors.
Some supported her, emphasizing the importance of respecting the child's choices, while others thought it was blown out of proportion and suggested an in-person talk.
Things took a turn when FMIL criticized text conversations, leading to a discussion on communication styles. Some sympathized with the mom's challenges, while others criticized her for not respecting FMIL's preference for in-person talks.
Curious about the details of what happened? Scroll down to read the entire story and the opinions of Redditors in the comments.
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Source: mom.com (not the actual photo)

Here's the full story:

Accomplished-Disk746's question

Source: Accomplished-Disk746

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OP explained to her fiancé's mom that they're teaching their son about personal boundaries

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OP reiterated her stance on not wanting her kids to feel guilty or responsible for others' feelings

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OP asked her future mother-in-law to avoid specific comments towards the children

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FMIL expressed to the fiancé that she was unaware of any intentional harm and would further distance herself if needed

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OP messaged her future mother-in-law about boundaries and expressed difficulty with in-person conversations

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The commenter believes OP was in the wrong for texting about respecting boundaries while not doing the same when the mother-in-law expressed a preference for in-person conversations

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The commenter agrees OP was in the wrong

The commenter agrees OP was in the wrong Source: theferal1
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OP was in the wrong for being upset that the mother-in-law expressed her feelings after the child initially refused a hug

OP was in the wrong for being upset that the mother-in-law expressed her feelings Source: Unhappy_Ad7172
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OP's appropriate reply should have been a simple acknowledgment like "Okay. Talk soon!"

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The initial message was an overreaction to the grandmother expressing happiness about the child choosing to hug her

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The commenter says "everyone sucks here"

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It was normal when the grandmother asked for a hug and made an innocent comment

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This commenter supports the OP, stating that an in-person conversation was unnecessary

This commenter supports the OP, stating that an in-person conversation was unnecessary Source: terpischore761
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This Redditor agrees that the OP was not wrong and the mother-in-law's aversion to texting may be to avoid accountability

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This person suggests a strategy to address the issue in person by reassuring the child that he doesn't have to hug someone just because they'll be sad

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This Redditor also supports the OP

This Redditor also supports the OP Source: legolaswashot
What are your thoughts on this mom's approach to setting boundaries with her child and addressing it with her future mother-in-law? Have you encountered similar situations, and how did you handle them? Share your insights and experiences in the comments below!
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