Stepdad Is Berated By Wife For Not Wanting To Adopt One Of Her Kids, But Reddit Sides With Him

When you marry a partner who already has children, you will be supposed to become the parent of their kids. If you could get along with the children, you would be happy and content with your family. In contrast, you might feel a bit uneasy if the partner’s child didn’t like you as you expected. However, what will happen if one of their kid love you while the other has opposite feelings? That’s exactly the dilemma the Reddit user u/adopterdaddd1652 has to face.

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The poster and his wife dated for 5 years before getting married 2 years ago. The wife had a 15-year-old son, James, and an 8-year-old daughter, Becky. The kids’ biological father was absent, and neither of the kids met him for a long time.
Recently, Becky told the Redditor that she hoped he could adopt her, which made him thrilled. They had been together since the girl was a little baby, so she saw him as her father. The poster adored Becky, so he agreed with the idea without a second thought. His wife also felt happy for him and her daughter if this plan was successful.

Source: r/AmItheAsshole

The problem was that the wife wanted her husband to adopt both kids. Unfortunately, the Redditor thought it was out of the question. Unlike Becky, who felt great affection towards her stepfather, her brother, James, didn’t open his heart to the poster. The teenager avoided the Reddit user as much as possible and didn’t even try to hide his irritation when he was with his stepdad alone.

Source: r/AmItheAsshole

Therefore, the poster was sure James would never agree with his mother. Nonetheless, when he tried to convince his wife, she raged at him and claimed he was treating her children differently.

Source: r/AmItheAsshole

Eventually, the couple decided to talk with James about the plan and ask his opinion. The Redditor was uncomfortable with this and believed that his stepson would absolutely turn down. He felt terrible when his wife insisted that if her son didn’t want to be adopted, she wouldn’t allow he to adopt Becky.

Source: r/AmItheAsshole

In response to the post, many netizens gave the Reddit user advice and words of wisdom. Most agreed that the man did nothing wrong, but he and his wife had to ask James before making any decision.

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Some expressed that they understood the mother’s point as adopting only Becky would make the case a bit awkward and complex. However, if she didn’t allow the adoption of Becky due to James, she would likely hurt her daughter’s feelings.

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By contrast, some slammed the wife because of her unreasonable request. If she respected James’ point of view, she should also care about Becky’s wish. Consequently, she would be cruel if she stopped her husband from adopting her daughter.

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What would you do if you were in the poster’s shoes? Do you think the wife’s view makes sense? What advice can you give the Redditor to handle this dilemma? Please write down your thought and ideas in the comment below!